I’ve felt like a pinball in a machine. But as time has ticked on, I’ve stopped spinning

Deborah was diagnosed with breast cancer in January last year. One year on, she is taking part in a Pink Ribbon Walk.

Deborah was diagnosed with breast cancer in January last year, and is taking part in a Pink Ribbon Walk at her favourite place, Chatsworth House.

I found a band of tissue on my right breast around Christmas. I had some time off work, so I booked an appointment with the GP, although I assumed it was nothing. 

My GP referred me to the breast clinic. Whilst there, my world crashed in. It was clear from my appointment that they had found something worrying. All I kept saying was, I can’t leave my children. I can’t die. 

I felt bitter and cross about my diagnosis. I was told I’d need a lymph node biopsy, a mastectomy and, if I wanted, a reconstruction. I found the whole situation surreal, and I felt overwhelmed by the choices I was having to make. I just wanted the cancer gone. 

My mastectomy and immediate reconstruction happened on Mother’s Day. I distracted myself whilst waiting for the surgeries by walking in the Peak District with friends and family.

It’s a strange feeling coming out the other end of a breast cancer diagnosis. I’ve felt like a pinball in a pinball machine. But as time has ticked on, I’ve stopped spinning.

I’m doing a Pink Ribbon Walk to say thank you to everyone involved in my care. It seemed appropriate to do the walk at Chatsworth House. I grew up not far from there and it’s full of happy memories for me (I’ve even swum in The Derwent!)  

I want to honour all those who have dealt with breast cancer before me, and all those who will come after. I want to join a show of strength and to say that you’re not alone.

Join Deborah on a Pink Ribbon Walk in association with Skechers to show your support for everyone affected by breast cancer

Pink Ribbon Walk

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